Gym Mom

In my haste to add a bit of cardio to my newfound diet, I've decided to revisit the gym. Hopefully on a much more frequent basis this year might I add. I'll admit that during my last attempt I just wasn't into it. With a new baby and adjusting to the daily on-goings of my life of three, I didn't have the energy to pee when I needed to - much less go to the gym.

Of course, my brain being the way that it is, I find myself pounding the treadmill or cycling miles on the bike and thinking only of what I can blog about next. I'm always looking for new ideas or unique content. And then it hit me: Musings from the Self-Proclaimed Gym Mother.

I realized, looking around at the early twenty somethings with their obviously-never-had-a-baby bodies, that I should be admired for what I'm doing. Damn it, I should be WORSHIPPED. In my perfect world, some non-mom types might even stare in awe and point at people such as me with complete adoration on their sweaty faces.

I'm not in denial that the above statement just means I'm delusional. Still though. Screw their tight colorful capris and ultra cute push-up tank tops. Upon entering the gym, I would like to strip off my coat and reveal my own special line of gym t-shirts. One that means something (and covers love handles and saddle bags). One that will make others blush in shame for laughing as my butt goes to and fro while I half sprint, half stumble on the treadmill. I think something along the lines of "My ass is big because I had three kids...". And on the back "What's your excuse?". Maybe I'm just being paranoid. Maybe people really are looking at my butt... who can know for sure?

Other than gym wear, I also think that there should be some kind of secret section for Moms where you never have to wait. Curse you, cute gym girl talking to hot gym guy. Sure you might have all the time in the world to stop and have lengthy conversations. Sitting on equipment and hanging with each other between sets. I, on the other hand, have 45 minutes to get A LOT done and I don't have time to wait while you trade thoughts on the latest episode of 90210.

Lastly, for the love of God. Of all the sections that the gym has created, I wish there was a "Mom in Progress" section. Yes, I do actually realize that the whole gym is a Work in Progress... Sheesh. Don't get your panties in a bunch. I just think that Moms have an awful lot to bounce back from. Particularly when some of us put our bodies through hell to have 3 kids 5 and under. We've got parts we haven't seen in years and we have to work double hard if we ever want to find them again. Stomach muscles, people! Stom-ach Mus-cles. Get your mind out of the gutter... So anyway. Yes, a special section would be nice. This way, when others walk past us they will smile and wave and mouth to us through the glass "Good Job!" and we will wave back in recognition of their respect. What? It could happen.

So there you have it. A few musings from a mother who probably doesn't frequent the gym quite enough to warrant any of these things... but still wishes they were true. Don't get me wrong, the gym is actually a wonderful place and there is nothing more motivating than to see so many others getting in shape. And being successful at it. It just gives me more reason to believe that I can do it too. Sigh. So I suppose I will forego my judgment on cute gym girl and hot gym guy. I suppose I will continue to work out in the everybody's-invited cardio section. Perhaps, though... I might just make myself a t-shirt.